A friend of ours recently complained about the difficulties of raising her teenaged children.  Although Rosemarie and I are at an age far beyond having to cope with this particular stage of family development, the following poem was written to try and cheer up all mothers of teenagers (and also to remind them that they are not alone!)

        

          

        

      

           

                        A Note To My Dear Child

                    There is no Teen who understands,
                    Why Mothers only have two Hands;
                    So watch yourselves and mend your Ways,
                    And heed indeed each Mother's Phrase!

                    "Take out the Trash; clean up your Room;
                              Please walk the Dog and here's the Broom;
                    So Bathroom, share! Get off the Throne!
                    Get off the Couch! Get off the Phone!

                    Now clear the Table; brush your Teeth;
                    Just make your Bed; look underneath;
                    Please use a Tissue when you sneeze;
                    And Money doesn't grow on Trees!

                    This Call's for you, some new Heartthrob;
                    Go do your Homework; get a Job;
                    Then fold the Laundry; mow the Lawn;
                    You will not smoke; be Home by Dawn!

                    Why can't you turn that Volume down?
                    You'll blast the Neighbors out of Town!
                    Tuck in your Shirt; you're acting strange;
                    Put on a Coat; bring back some Change!

                    Now do the Dishes; don't forget;      
                    You can't go out; your Hair's still wet;
                    And chew your Food; just sit up straight;
                    Turn out the Lights; please watch your Weight!

                    Oh give it up; it's just a Fad;
                    You'll drive us all stark raving mad;                   
                    It won't come out; it must be Ink;
                    Who left these Sneakers in the Sink?

                    Your Friend's green Eyebrows are bizarre;
                    And, no, you may not drive my Car;
                    No Body piercing nor Tattoos;
                    I'm not your Maid; pick up those Shoes!

                    Oh lighten up and don't talk back;
                    You'll give your Dad a Heart Attack;
                    Just stop the fighting; get a Life;
                    You really need to get a Wife!

                    Wake up, right now, it's Time for School!"
                    Are not the Words of Mothers, cruel;
                    These are the very Words you'll say,
                    When you're a Parent, too, someday!

 

 

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© Howard B. Eskin 2004