No future President; no future candidate for public office nor any governmental leader will ever be saintly enough to be able to withstand this kind of partisan scrutiny. If some people have a problem with the Oval Office, who gives them the right to burn down the White House?
Enough Already!
Oh awful Meanies of the Right,
Conservatives, who take delight,
Attacking Ev’rything in sight;
E’er criticize for Fun or Spite;
No Doubt they’d rather run than fight;
Their constant Bark’s worse than their Bite!
This Kenneth Starr’s beyond the Pale;
To hound poor Victims off to Jail,
He’d Valjean-chase the Holy Grail;
His lawful Quest is bound to fail,
Like Ahab and that scary Whale;
A Grinch-blessed, Gingrich Fairy Tale?
These Prosecutors do demand;
Investigations to expand;
Subpoena Powers out of Hand;
They’ll threaten Scarlet Letters, brand;
And immunize a Witness, stand,
To squeeze Indictments, juried, grand!
Wild Headlines break; filed Stories clipped;
News Anchors lead with Leaks well quipped;
Alleged Crimes; Reporters tipped;
More Reputations sorely ripped;
For Monica remains tight-lipped,
Unless, of course, she’s Linda Tripped!
The frenzied Media persists;
Ms. Jones’ Case has been dismissed,
With no Appeal, Starr-crossed, not kissed;
Though zealous, Paranoids insist,
On finding Sin where none exists;
Inquisitors just can't resist!
When Secret Service testifies,
Protection out the Window flies;
Bill Clinton weaves such wicked Lies,
Then White House Aides spin Alibis;
His Opposition magnifies,
The Prosecution, crucifies!
This Fourth Estate must e’er report,
A President who’d dare cavort;
Republicans presume a Tort,
As Democrats withdraw support;
Politicos all fume and snort,
To guarantee whose Day in Court?
If at the Polls you can’t unseat,
A President, who’s indiscreet;
Set Wiretaps; cajole, browbeat;
Informers, bold, who lie and cheat;
Use legal Traps, perhaps, Deceit;
Grill White House Aides; turn up the Heat.
Get Evidence, not just, complete;
All those opposed, you must defeat;
You’re sitting in God’s Judgment Seat!
Such Arrogance could be effete,
Iconoclast, would-be, Elite,
Agendas pushed; beyond Conceit.
Your Accusations in Concrete;
Sam Dash, resigned, beat his Retreat,
While Hyde and Seek played Trick or Treat;
Censure, indict, beseech, entreat,
Impeach, convict; Revenge is sweet;
Whose Fam’ly's Values did you meet?
Self-righteous Folks, who are obsessed,
Hate Presidents who’ve sinned, transgressed,
Still through it all, have not confessed;
The Voters’ Will, has been finessed,
By Congressmen, consumed, possessed;
All Testimony's second-guessed!
Our Constitution’s Acid Test,
Is Innuendo, blue-stained, dressed;
A Congress mad, yet, Full Court pressed,
Are, with themselves, too damned impressed;
This Nation’s under House Arrest,
So please let go; give it a Rest!
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© Howard B. Eskin 1998